Nikolai Volkoff

As a kid, I (Matt) used to watch professional wrestling every Saturday morning. Then, would practice the moves by jumping on to the bed with one, semi-furious elbow. I put a lot of pain into that bed.

One of the "Villains" who wrestled was named Nikolai Volkoff. He was an Evil Soviet who was most famous for singing the Soviet National Anthem before a match. There must have been thousands of other ten year old kids who could sing the Soviet National Anthem.

So, why is this of note? Because we'll be neighbors. Well, not house neighbors, office neighbors. There's a gym opening above the office where I often work, North of Baltimore and he'll be one of the trainers.

When he sees me, I may be sporting the same outfit he wears in the following classic video. Except mine will be purple and I will ridicule him in Vietnamese instead of Russian. Get a load of the OTHER guy in the video. Blondie says he has ten thousand dollars to pay Nikolai so he'll break another wrestler's arm. I think he should pocket the ten large, get a haircut and put on some pants. And watch Blondie totally haul off and punch Nikolai's chest at minute 1:20. That's the kind of force only my childhood bed knows.