Sports

When I (Matt) was younger, I played Sports. Baseball, Lacrosse, Hockey, and Football. The Sport I was best at was Hockey though I never had intentions of hoisting up a Stanley Cup. I favored Hockey because when you were not practicing or playing a game, there were never expectations to be serious unless it was five minutes before the game began or you were in a timeout. Essentially, you could spend your off time making fun of your teammates.

On a road trip for my College Hockey Team, I drove down to Blacksburg Virginia with the Team Captain. I had to pee REAL bad while we rolled down the highway. The Captain refused to stop, handed me a bottle, and told me I would have to do my business in mid-drive. After I realized there would be no way that he'd stop, I reluctantly took the bottle, put my knees on the passenger seat (facing the wrong way), propped myself up so high in the car that my head was bent under the car ceiling, and began to try to..relax..to do my business. I quickly understood why this guy refused to stop at a highway rest stop. Every time I began, he would slow down the car so it was parallel to the closest car in the next lane. Imagine you are driving down the highway, a car pulls up next to you, and you see a kid with an embarrassed expression, propped up in the car, facing the wrong way, trying to pee in a bottle. This went on for about ten minutes. Though I was frustrated and embarrassed, I could not help but laugh at his creativity. This was Hockey.

Football, on the other hand, was serious. Before a high school football game, you'd have to arrive at least two hours before it began. Would you spend most of this time discussing plays? No. You had to sit in a corner and think about the game. For an hour and a half at least you would have sit in complete silence. While the most intense players would sit in a corner staring at the wall, I would try to stare at the wall. Instead of visualizing the big block or touchdown, I visualized--a wall. After about 30 seconds I would become bored. About a minute later, I would become very bored. I then began to fill this time by being a goof ball. I would talk like an old lady or, with a straight face, begin to put on my football pants as if they were a football jersey. Needless to say, I wasn't the Captain of the Football team, nor the most popular.

The reason I recall sports today is because of the video below, which my brother sent me. If you care to watch this high school football coach, you'll see the coach is half crazy. The video gets nuttier as it progresses. It speaks for itself. I don't believe it is bad or good. It is what it is. I could describe my high school football coach, but I don't really like to be negative (at least here). He was probably a good coach. The problem was that I just didn't belong in football.

So, do I have a point? Yes. I could never take Sport too seriously because it was not real. Did I want to win? Did I try to win? Of course, but there was always something in the back of my mind that pestered me..it's a game. A diversion. Life, on the other hand, is different. Life is serious (as opposed to football), especially when you get older. I can spend two hours in serious thought, staring at the wall, thinking about mundane and unexciting tasks. I spend about 99% of my day being serious. With this understanding, I do not hesitate spending the remaining one percent doing things like answering telemarketing calls in ridiculous voices or sing loudly in the middle of a grocery store with whatever song is blaring on the speakers at the time. I don't believe this to be good or bad. Like an angry football coach, it is what it is.

Here's the crazy coach.